If there is one common thread that runs through most of the world’s problems, it’s anger. Violence, abuse, and hatred all grow when fueled by anger’s empty fumes. We’ve all seen how anger damages relationships and destroys love and trust. What’s more, medical researchers have recently found that anger can lead to sleeping problems, excess eating, and long-term heart damage.1 No, nothing good comes from anger.

But there is good news. With so much in life that seems beyond our control, our own anger does not have to be. We can do something about it! We can start by simply choosing to give others the benefit of the doubt. Instead of assuming they are purposefully attempting to harm us or offend us, we can choose to believe their motives are innocent. Truly, much of our anger is caused by unintentional offenses: the scowl, the thoughtless comment, even the seemingly deliberate snub may not have been intended.

It’s true that sometimes people do mean to offend or take advantage of us. But wise and contented people don’t let such irritation boil over into their commute, their relationships, their plans and expectations. They understand that a certain amount of unfairness and unkindness are part of life. But they don’t give inconsiderate people power over their happiness and contentment.

Yes, life can be exasperating, but if we let anger get the best of us, then we really have lost what’s best of us—our self-control and personal freedom. As Ralph Waldo Emerson wisely said, “For every minute you remain angry, you give up sixty seconds of peace of mind.”2 So when anger mounts, instead of getting upset about things we can’t control, we can pause, if only for a moment, breathe deeply, and count to 10—or 100 if necessary. As we replace anger with peace, hostility with understanding, and hatred with love and compassion, in a small but real way, we are making the world a better place.

See Jeanne Whalen, “Angry Outbursts Really Do Hurt Your Health, Doctors Find,” Wall Street Journal, Mar. 24, 2015, D1, wsj.com/articles/angry-outbursts-really-do-hurt-your-health-doctors-find-1427150596. 
In The Very Best of Ralph Waldo Emerson, ed. David Graham (2014), np.

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The First Presidency and Council of the Twelve Apostles
of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints

WE, THE FIRST PRESIDENCY and the Council of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, solemnly proclaim that marriage between a man and a woman is ordained of God and that the family is central to the Creator’s plan for the eternal destiny of His children.

ALL HUMAN BEINGS—male and female—are created in the image of God. Each is a beloved spirit son or daughter of heavenly parents, and, as such, each has a divine nature and destiny. Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal, and eternal identity and purpose.

IN THE PREMORTAL REALM, spirit sons and daughters knew and worshipped God as their Eternal Father and accepted His plan by which His children could obtain a physical body and gain earthly experience to progress toward perfection and ultimately realize their divine destiny as heirs of eternal life. The divine plan of happiness enables family relationships to be perpetuated beyond the grave. Sacred ordinances and covenants available in holy temples make it possible for individuals to return to the presence of God and for families to be united eternally.

THE FIRST COMMANDMENT that God gave to Adam and Eve pertained to their potential for parenthood as husband and wife. We declare that God’s commandment for His children to multiply and replenish the earth remains in force. We further declare that God has commanded that the sacred powers of procreation are to be employed only between man and woman, lawfully wedded as husband and wife.

WE DECLARE the means by which mortal life is created to be divinely appointed. We affirm the sanctity of life and of its importance in God’s eternal plan.

HUSBAND AND WIFE have a solemn responsibility to love and care for each other and for their children. “Children are an heritage of the Lord” (Psalm 127:3). Parents have a sacred duty to rear their children in love and righteousness, to provide for their physical and spiritual needs, and to teach them to love and serve one another, observe the commandments of God, and be law-abiding citizens wherever they live. Husbands and wives—mothers and fathers—will be held accountable before God for the discharge of these obligations.

THE FAMILY is ordained of God. Marriage between man and woman is essential to His eternal plan. Children are entitled to birth within the bonds of matrimony, and to be reared by a father and a mother who honor marital vows with complete fidelity. Happiness in family life is most likely to be achieved when founded upon the teachings of the Lord Jesus Christ. Successful marriages and families are established and maintained on principles of faith, prayer, repentance, forgiveness, respect, love, compassion, work, and wholesome recreational activities. By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children. In these sacred responsibilities, fathers and mothers are obligated to help one another as equal partners. Disability, death, or other circumstances may necessitate individual adaptation. Extended families should lend support when needed.

WE WARN that individuals who violate covenants of chastity, who abuse spouse or offspring, or who fail to fulfill family responsibilities will one day stand accountable before God. Further, we warn that the disintegration of the family will bring upon individuals, communities, and nations the calamities foretold by ancient and modern prophets.

WE CALL UPON responsible citizens and officers of government everywhere to promote those measures designed to maintain and strengthen the family as the fundamental unit of society.

This proclamation was read by President Gordon B. Hinckley as part of his message at the General Relief Society Meeting held September 23, 1995, in Salt Lake City, Utah.

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Pottery is among mankind’s oldest and most enduring crafts. The process itself feels like a work of art, as the expert potter carefully, patiently shapes a lump of clay into a beautiful, useful vessel. While finishing the work takes time and patient effort, the result is clearly worth it. It’s no wonder that pottery making is often used as a metaphor for how our lives are gently molded by the patient hand of God. 

But patience is not always a popular virtue today, when almost everything is instantaneous. We eat fast food, photos appear instantly on our smartphones, and we can quickly access almost any information we need. Waiting even a few seconds seems like too long, as we hurry from one app, one website, or one transaction to another. Our time is hardly measured in minutes anymore, but in bits per second—not just fast, but superfast.

This increase in speed has brought many advantages. But it can also lead us to be less than patient with each other and with ourselves. 

Patience does not mean suffering while we wait to get what we want - that’s more like impatience! When we are truly patient, we kindly and lovingly allow others the time they need to reach their full potential. We do not resent the fact that progression is a process, and we resist putting undue pressure and unrealistic expectations on others—or on ourselves—knowing that it will only hinder growth and create frustration.

Patience means not despairing when mistakes happen. It means making room for change as we all learn a better way. It means we will sometimes be offended, but we won’t harbor resentment or anger as we work out a solution. Patience inspires us to give people another chance and the benefit of the doubt, just as we hope they will do for us. Patience is the power that comes from hope and confidence that things will, in time, improve. 

Even in our fast-paced life, let us allow the Master Potter to do His work. If we are patient, we will see a beautiful result.

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Only those who are willing to risk heartbreak and disappointment will ever know what it means to truly love. 

As C. S. Lewis put it: “To love at all is to be vulnerable. Love anything, and your heart will certainly be wrung and possibly broken. If you want to make sure of keeping [your heart] intact, you must give [it] to no one, not even to an animal. Wrap it carefully round with hobbies and little luxuries; avoid all entanglements; lock it up safe in the casket - of your selfishness. But in that casket - it will become unbreakable, impenetrable, irredeemable.”¹ And ultimately, incapable of experiencing true love!

This simple truth applies to all of life's beautiful, blessed experiences—each one comes only to those who open themselves to the possibility of their opposites: joy and sorrow, heartache and happiness, abundance and loss. It is in the very prospect of pain that we learn to truly appreciate love.

Many years ago, a woman purchased a greeting card about love. She intended to give the card away, but she ending up keeping it because she liked the sentiment so much. Eventually, she framed it and shared it with someone she loved. The card read, “Another's heart is a rare and precious gift. Hold it gently and with both hands.”

When others give us their love, they give us great power—the power to hurt them as no one else can, but also the power to bless and lift and delight them as no one else can. And they have determined that this possibility is worth the risk. So when we love, we must be gentle with our criticism, generous with our praise, gracious with our forgiveness, and ever grateful for those who have entrusted us with their heart.

Truly, to love is to walk on holy ground. One who loves holds—in both hands—a portion of the potential, the joy, and the happiness of another. It is a sacred trust, born of the confidence that love is a song that never needs to end.²

1. The Four Loves (1960), 121.
2. See Larry Morey, “Love Is a Song” (1942).

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Few things release the feelings of the heart like singing does. It brings deep emotions to the surface that we might otherwise struggle to express. When we sing, we reveal what’s in our soul, and this honesty of heart connects us with others despite barriers of time, place, and culture. 

But sometimes we need a little help appreciating the power of music. One young man, searching to find his niche in middle school, had no intentions of joining the boys’ choir - at least not until the choral teacher approached him and asked why he was not registered for her class. He couldn’t quickly come up with any good reason or excuse, so she walked him to the school office and made the necessary adjustments to his schedule. She told him that she needed him in the choir, that he would love singing, and that she wanted to be his teacher. 

The next thing he knew, he was sitting in the front row of the boys’ choir. Placing him next to one of the strongest singers in the class, the teacher made sure the young man could not fail. And succeed he did. Singing in that choir changed him: he discovered his voice and learned about the powerful influence music could have in his life. Perhaps most important, he knew his choir teacher cared about him. She cared enough to expose him to music that would enrich his life for decades to come. He never became a soloist, and he may not ever sing in a choir again, but he still loves music and remembers with fondness his dedicated teacher. Both he and his parents still praise that wonderful choral director. 

Whether we blend our voices with others in a choir or simply sing in the shower or car, singing can lift our spirits, express our feelings, and help us make meaningful connections with others - and with the divine. The song of the heart can be more than a song; it can be a prayer, a confession of heartfelt emotion, an expression of love. 

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Inspirational Poems: Miracles Happens: Though troubles assail And war affrights Though government should fail And sickness unite Yet one thing secures us Whatever be...

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A woman who loved soufflé decided to make some for her family for a special occasion. But she became nervous when she read the recipe for the light, fluffy cake. Soufflé is not easy to make, and it has to be served quickly to keep it from falling. So as the years, holidays, and birthdays went by, she continued to save the recipe, not quite ready to attempt it. Her family grew up, and she grew old. Finally she gave the recipe to one of her children with this wise counsel: “Take the risk. Make the soufflé. If it falls, it falls. But you’ll never have it if you don’t try.”

Many of us have trips we wish to take, talents we want to develop, even friends we’d like to make, but our plans get caught in the inertia of daily living. And then, in what seems like the blink of an eye, the window of opportunity closes.

Perhaps we hesitate because we fear failure. Yet the greatest risk is refusing to risk; the greatest failure is refusing to try—it means we will never taste that soufflé, see that dazzling vista, or enjoy that grand accomplishment.

So how do we break free of our self-imposed limitations? We can start by trying something new. We can say hello to the withdrawn co-worker we’ve never spoken to. We can try a new food, or read a book by a new author. We can sing a song that has always seemed outside our range. We can sign up for a class we always wanted to take. We can use the vast offerings of the Internet to research a famous artist, find out about a recent scientific discovery, or start to learn a new language.

Don’t wait until “someday.” Today is what we have. As a wise mother once said: “Twenty years from now you will be more disappointed by the things you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”¹

Like the soufflé, if we fall, we fall. But we’ll never know if we don’t try.

1. In H. Jackson Brown, P.S. I Love You (1990), 13.

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